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The PBCers have a new quilt square to add to the ever-growing quilt.
Jim Nabors, actor, singer and liver transplant recipient offered his insight and experience in a personal visit with us. The following is an attempt to tell you every detail that we can remember. Needless to say, it was quite a night.
Jean Haynes the PBC “quilt lady” and Karen Luna (THE ATR) were allowed to visit Jim Nabors backstage one evening before his performance in Branson, Missouri. Jean, her husband John, and I were escorted thru the house and entered the backstage area thru the stage left door itself. Down the hall we went with Mr. Nabor’s assistant. When we reached his dressing room, Mr. Nabors was seated in a chair waiting for us to arrive. Dressed casually and sporting a warm smile he stood and greeted us as we made our introductions. Without hesitation he agreed to signing a quilt square as a friend to the PBCers and he also gave us permission to use the photo on the PBC website and in the American Liver Foundation newsletter. While I was snapping the photo, Jean showed him pictures of the quilts and shared with him the significance of the quilt project. He signed his quilt square with his tx date of 2/7/94.
We told him about the small but mighty PBCers and he told us about his own experience. Mr. Nabor’s experience was one of sudden liver failure due to Hep B. He was curious about the slow progression associated with PBC and Jean gave him a good overview of how our bile ducts are affected and how the disease progresses. I told him of chatting with others from all over the world in all different stages of the disease. Jean and I told him about being able to discuss transplants with those who have a new anniversary to celebrate and discuss beepers or setbacks for those who are waiting. We also told him how gratifying it was to find others, especially our “newbies”, because we get stronger as we grow in numbers. He found it to be very interesting that so far I can only find five others online from Missouri and that Jean can find only six PBCers online in Oklahoma. He said that the support we give one another is a key. He said, “In fact, the key to success in facing transplantation is a positive mental outlook. You just have to have a positive mental outlook.” He then told us of his supportive friends when he became suddenly ill.
When Mr. Nabors fell ill, he was also near death within days. His dear friend Carol Burnette swooped in to offer support and helped him locate doctors in California. She also organized his support network and let friends know that they were needed. He particularly appreciated the support from Florence Henderson’s husband as he is a psychologist and immediately went in to help Mr. Nabors utilize relaxation techniques as well as pain management and hypnosis therapy. He credits this in helping him gain a lot of the positive mental outlook he needed. Naturally, Ms. Burnette helped him keep a sense of humor too. He stressed the importance of surrounding yourself with supportive people, whether it be friends, family, other liver patients, or doctors.
Before leaving we told him more about the PBCers including the Vegas invasion. He was very compassionate and seemed touched when we described meeting other PBCers and how the ALF has pledged millions to help us with a Fund for the Cure.
I was also able to ask him about returning to performance after a liver transplant since that has been a personal concern. He said, “Aw Karen, don’t you worry. I was singin’ six weeks after my transplant.” He told us his doctor called him and said, “Jim, will you come sing at a little party for me?” He said he had told himself he wasn’t ready but felt obliged and agreed. He sang for a hugely attended transplant/donor family group banquet. After singing “The Impossible Dream,” he said there wasn’t a dry eye to be found and that it was a profound experience for him.
We thanked him for his time and he wished us well with a sincere “good luck and God be with you both”. Jean, John, and I then left to be guided thru the dark theatre by an usher who came to our rescue as we were instructed to surface from the stage door in mid performance of the “warm-up" pianist. We had stayed with him quite a bit longer than we anticipated. Mr. Nabors was very, very genuine and gentle natured. He took the stage an hour into the show, about a half hour after we left him. He voice was resoundingly perfect and incredibly wonderful.
During one of the chat breaks Mr. Nabors takes between songs, he talked about being within days of dying and being told he needed a liver immediately. He told several stories about being famous and also being sick.
One story he told was about his first visit to Branson five years ago, just a short time before he knew he was seriously ill. He said he had come into town during Thanksgiving and that he was extremely tired when he got here. He went to the hotel and was told that his room wasn’t ready and he didn’t want to do anything but go sleep and get away from the public eye. He decided his best option was to go find something to eat until his room was ready, so he headed out on what is normally a very busy bustling strip of highway, full of restaurants. He failed to realize that on Thanksgiving this little burg shuts down so the only place that he could find was a McGuffey’s restaurant. He went in with his baseball cap pulled down, his sunglasses on, and his jacket collar flipped up. The hostess was nowhere to be found and he ducked into an empty booth hoping a waitress would wander by to take his order of soup, since that’s all he could stomach. A little boy of about eleven came to his table and he thought a fan had spotted him but instead the little boy asked, “Can I get ya some turkey mister?” to which “naw, just some soup” was the answer. He said he thought it was kind of funny that a little kid would be taking his order, but hey, this was Branson and lots of places are family owned and it was Thanksgiving, but . . ..The little boy said, “Mister. We don’t have soup today. We have turkey.”
Mr. Nabors said he was so tired he didn’t want to fight it so he told the little boy to go ahead and just bring him the turkey. A few minutes later the boy reappeared with a plateful of turkey and the trimmings too. While Mr. Nabors was eating, the manager passed by him. He recognized him and said, “Mr. Nabors, what are you doing here?” Mr. Nabors explained that his hotel room wasn't ready, he wasn't feeling well, and he just wanted to get a bowl of soup but the boy said that today turkey was the only thing available. The manager said, “Yes. Turkey is the only thing available and I get being hotel-less counts because today is the community dinner for the homeless.” Being from Branson, I particularly enjoyed this story.
Ok ok. Jean will never let me live this down so I might as well tell you the next part. At one point in the show he asked for lady volunteers from the audience to help him with a special number. My hand shot up. Jean giggled “Goodie goodie, go Karen, go!” and on stage I headed with about six other woman. He asked us to tell our names, where we were from and a little about ourselves. I was third in line and he of course recognized me from earlier backstage. He gave me a hug and put the microphone in my face. I said, “My name is Karen and I am from right here in Branson, Missouri. I am a retired theatre teacher and debate coach.” He then asked me if I wanted to share how we had met. I said “Sure!!!!” not knowing exactly what was going to come out of my mouth. To the best of my recollection I said, “I have a rare liver condition called PBC and I do volunteer work for organ donation awareness for the American Liver Foundation and the PBCers which is the computer group for this condition and the reason I came to meet you earlier is because, well, I guess I am going to have a shared experience with you sometime in the future” and he hugged me tighter. I don’t remember what he said but it was well wishes and then he moved to the next lady. Before he gave her the mic, he turned back to me and said, “Hey Karen. Do you know what you are really in for here with a liver transplant? Like all those forms and doctors and tests and stuff? Well, can I share a story with you about well, you know, well, you. . . have to have unpleasant stuff like enemas and all.” The audience laughed as did I and he went on.
"Well, the doc came in when Carol Burnette was with me and the doc said Jim you know your odds are about 30% of coming thru this without this complication or 30% without dying, so here sign these forms, okay? And then the doc just turned on his heels and left me to sign these forms saying that
I understood I didn’t have good odds going in. Carol was trying to help and keep things straight, but light under the circumstances. An orderly walked in and said, “Time for your enema Mr. Nabors” Carol looked at me and then said to the orderly, “No need to waste it. He won’t be needing it.” Of course the audience roared and he said a little more then moved on down the line of ladies. We were then given feather boas. I shoulda known.
We were led offstage to his assistant who gave us instructions and a demonstration of how to shimmy like an old bump and grinder fan dancer. As Mr. Nabors sang, we each were shifted on stage one at a time to cavort across stage to him. Having been a theatre teacher I have no fear of such things, so when it was my turn I shimmied right out there, relying on my old days of doing musicals like Gypsy or Nunsense. Mr. Nabors was very amused I think, because he stopped singing to laugh and then said, “And your telling me you need a LIVER?????” It was a moment I won’t soon forget. And I doubt Jean will ever let me live it down either!!!
We enjoyed the rest of the show and decided to stand in line with others for autographs as we wanted to thank him again for seeing us and offering his time. The line was long, but when it was our turn he called us by name and let us take another picture. Just before John snapped the picture, he grasped my hand and then I told him, “We will tell all of the PBCers about your kindnesses to us tonight. Thank you so much again.” And he gave Jean and I yet another parting hug and hope with the shared connection of offering support to others with liver disease.
PS. from Jean: Karen sure knows how to cavort on stage. Heee Heee Heee
Pictures of the event
Quilt Signing Jim Nabors and Jean
Way to go Jean and Karen!
