Living donor hopes others will do a kind deed for others
By Mitch Fryer
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Connie Carley knew what she had to do. She could feel it in her heart and soul, she said. "Sandy Gilbertsen's mother is getting worse," Carley, 52, of Manor Township, heard the other teachers say at lunch in the faculty room at Lenape Elementary School in December.
"Carolynne Lewis needed a transplant after 15 years of suffering with degenerative disease of the liver," the teachers said. "The 59-year-old Ford City woman was too far down on the donor waiting list. She needed a living donor. No one in her family was a match."
Carley and Gilbertsen were colleagues and casual friends. The most that could be said about their relationship was that their classroom doors were connected. Carley didn't know Carolynne Lewis. None of that mattered. Carley never thought twice before consenting to give part of her liver to save a stranger.
"I couldn't stop thinking about her," Carley said. "I had a strong feeling inside. It was like I was being called by God. I just had to do this."
Carley went to Gilbertsen's classroom. "She came to my door crying," Gilbertsen said. "She said she wanted to be my mom's liver donor. She said she felt a calling." Gilbertsen told her no, that it was too much for her to give. Carley persisted. She took and passed a series of tests. The result was that she was a match to be a donor.
"We saw it was meant to be," Gilbertsen said. "Connie is a very religious person," added Elderton Elementary School teacher Kathy Walters. "She believed she was called by God." "It was like a miracle," Walters said.
Carley got the OK from her husband, their two adult children and the rest of her family. Then she told the other teachers about her decision in an e-mail. "Some were crying; some said don't do it; some said what a kind thing it was to do," Carley said. "They prayed for me. That's what I was looking for. They gave me their support."
The operation was in January.
Doctors removed about 60 percent of Carley's liver mass and transplanted it to Lewis. The liver can grow back to its normal size and functioning within two to three weeks, according to medical opinion, and Carley's liver was able to fully regenerate after the operation.
"I had no fear or anxiety over the surgery," Carley said.
"I felt angel wings around me and wrapped in cozy blankets," she said.
Despite Carley's sacrifice, Lewis never was able to get out of intensive care. Lewis died two months after the operation.
"The liver transplant took, but there were surgical complications," Walters said. "Connie didn't accept that well. She had a hard time with that." "I didn't think I was going to make it through emotionally," Carley said. "Part of me had died. I was angry. Why did I go through this?"
Then someone told Carley, "You gave her hope."
"I'll live with that," Carley said. "I'll find out later why I had to do this. I know God had me do this for a reason."
Carley's colleagues believe they know the reason. It was for her to inspire others to think about being a living organ donor and to be changed by what she did. "Good things do come from tragedy," Walters said. "By the inspiration it brings to other people."
"I wish more people would be more kind to others, and do things like Connie did," Gilbertsen said.
"Pay it forward, like the movie," Carley said. "I don't mean to go out and donate an organ. Just do any kind thing for someone."
Carley was honored by Delta Kappa Gamma Society International, an organization of women educators, as its 2006 Pennsylvania Woman of Distinction. Carley still was recovering from her surgery and unable to attend the ceremony in State College.
Members of the Alpha Theta Chapter of the society decided to present Carley with her award. They held a luncheon today at Walters' home. Walters is president of the local chapter. The group is accepting donations for the Primary Biliary Cirrhosis Society in honor of Carley and in memory of Lewis.
Primary Biliary Cirrhosis is a chronic liver disease that slowly destroys the bile ducts within the liver. Liver inflammation over a period of years may cause scarring which leads to cirrhosis.
Tax deductible donations can be made to "Dr. Gershwin's Research Fund" or the "PBC Education Fund" and mailed to PBCers Organization, 1430 Garden Road, Pearland, Texas, 77581. Specify which fund.
For inquiries about making donations, call Walters at 724-763-8239.
"Part of me is already in Heaven," Carley said. "That's a good feeling."
Mitch Fryer can be reached at mfryer@tribweb.com or (724) 543-1303 ext 242.